Saturday, October 12, 2013
I am a woman trapped in a man's body
I've tried to keep it a secret for some time now. not to everyone, but i have been guarded about who i tell. No more!!
I am now out. the process started a while ago - last summer probably - when i told my then girl friend prior to us hooking up - in fact it was the first thing i told her when we first physically met at a pub, over a drink. she was wonderful about it and that gave me more confidence.
Last summer i went out as a female on a couple of occasions and started integrating some female clothing and a more feminine hair-style into my normal daily look.
this year I threw away the bulk of my male clothing - as I had lost weight, none of it fitted me, and replaced them with women's clothes... bootcut jeans... fitted jackets and tops... cardigans... and a woman's military style jacket from F&F which i wear daily!
I told my boss back in February that I was seeking gender reassignment (and i hadn't even seen my doctor back then), worked out a schedule for telling my closest colleagues, told my friends, came out on Twitter and Facebook, and finally came out fully at work just last month.
Now its time to come out on blogger. I've had the odd idiot take the piss but nothing serious, and nothing that is going to stop me from fullfilling my dream, that of living as a woman full time for the rest of my life.
Anyway i mention this now because I have had a blog for my female persona quite some time. and I have now begun the process of integrating both my blogs.
My female self, Stella, me now, started out in life, probably around 1999, with no name whatsoever, and was of very little substance, other than a few outfits and the odd midnight walk. I'd been cross-dressing as a young child, but the idea that there might be an actual female personality waiting to escape was not somehting i was even willing to consider until around 2007.
In 2006 I named her Stevie. Crap name I know, but it was obvious and easy. In 2008 I decided on Elizabeth, or Liz, but by the end of last year I knew that name was not for me. suddenly the reality of becoming female and having a female name focussed my mind. I consutled friends and Stella was born. The rest is history. My history. Her history.